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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/8/2007
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Am happy to hear you aren't the only cuckoo in your nest Liz :^)
Arnold is a rogue, no-account, pile of poop husband.... fixing a stove...if you say so Arnie!
You will soon have a rampaging mob of angry Usefilm woman on your doorstep, brandishing their cameras, trying to get proof of your indescretions. Watch your back buddy!!
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/8/2007
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Drink some water and go have a good lie down darling, and don't you worry your pretty head over the widow. I have come to the conclusion that Sheila is a sucker anyway, I mean really, no wonder Arnold never wanted to be intimate before the wedding, didn't want to let her know he was packing twice as much heat as most blokes, scare her off with his limited capabilities....nah, let the widow have him I say.
Sheila is better off without him.
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Liz Wallis
{K:26133} 2/8/2007
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 OMG!!!! Sheila, woman....what have you done!!! And where was that no account husband when you needed him....off tending another womans needs, if you please!!!! just like a man. I don't care if he was supposed to be at work, he should have been by your side.....admitt it hun, you jumped in way too soon.
Such vivid detail Bek....my sides hurt now....you have my whole family roaring wtih laughter at the hilarity of it all....:)
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Sandra Anderson
{K:5837} 2/8/2007
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Well I had the same sentiments about this widower...but then, would arnold be attracted to a 97 year old bottle brunette? ok ok a bird in the bush is worth 2 in the hand....ehehehhehehee...b u t...as much as arnold isn't too my liking, i ACTUALLY think it's a smoke screen...i reckon sheila should check out his palm pilot instead.....he's meant to be a real hot sort!!! hahhahahahaha. oh the midday sun is getting to me.
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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I think Patrick referred to Arnold as a 'stallion' actually Jan.
Sheila with the widow, I hesitate to imagine that as well, buuuuut you never can tell, eh?
B
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Jan Hoffman
{K:39467} 2/7/2007
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My head spins with all this intrigue. I just cannot see Sheila with the widow. But Arnold.... that is a horse of a different color.
--Jan
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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Honestly Patrick, you really think Sheila wil have the time to meet the needs of a lonely widow?!! Have you seen the results of the cesarean?!!! Unless of course..I suppose she could leave Arnold to be a house-hubby, make him do some REAL work for a change. It has been a bit of a roller-coaster, dealing with Consumer Affairs day after day, the complaints rolling in about exploding ovens and un-frosty fridges.
I hope the widow has the same size feet as Sheila, they can share her shoe collection, amongst other things!!!
Perhaps after she leaves the hospital she could bake her a carrot cake and pop around for a chat...
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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Actually, now you mention it that could be a hot storyline... Sheila takes up with a lonely widow who dresses entirely in black every day and spends all her time in the graveyard. Sheila is moved by her tragic loss and spends more and more time with her... but Sheila has a thing about widows in black and before long a whole new avenue of opportunity opens up before her... that is until Arnold catches them at it... his trainers turn red as a symbol of his rage and embarrassment...
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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How about 'Oh, Sister'? Kind of appropriate too, yeah?
Also, with the pitter patter of little fingers 'one more cup of coffee' could come in handy too.....
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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No... I was trying to find a way to work as many Bob Dylan album titles into a few sentences as possible... namely, 'Shot Of Love', 'Desire', 'Saved', 'Oh Mercy', 'Time Out Of Mind', 'New Morning', 'The Freewheelin' Bob Dylan', 'Blonde On Blonde', 'Good As I Been To You', 'Infidels', 'Modern Times', 'World Gone Wrong', 'Love And Theft'. I have too much time on my hands at the moment...
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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I think 'poor Arnold' has more on his mind than his suffering wife at the moment! Rogue!!!
I have no idea what time it is over in the U.K. but I think Patrick has either trundled off to bed or his place of employment...he has gone suddenly quiet. Perhaps the emotion of the evening has worn him out.....or he needs a reality break...LOL
Am so happy that this is giving you a laugh, I am enjoying it so much, the way that the comments have taken up the story line has been a real bonus, keeps me in stitches...my family thinks I have gone quite mad.
:^) B
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Shirley D. Cross-Taylor
{K:173998} 2/7/2007
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POOR Sheila! And Arnold DOES look worried! (You do this SO well, Bek.)
Now you and Patrick have me howling with laughter again!
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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Eventually the drugs will wear off Onie, Sheila will come to her senses, we just have to convince Patrick to keep his mouth shut!!!
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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Yes Meg, yes.
A widow WITH a broken stove...I know. I had the same thoughts myself, what with Sheila's reluctance to let Arnold near her after the 'elephant man' discovery.
Add to that her hormonal ups and downs due to the pregnancy,the weight gain..... I fear that Arnold has found her quite unbearable to be around.
I am hoping for Sheila's sake, and that of their unborn child, that Arnold has not strayed.
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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Are you suggesting Patrick that Sheila should take up with the widow down the street?
Heavens...there's a whole new set of pictures!!!!
We must remeber that meddling in others lives often leads to a whole lotta trouble, best keep your lips zipped and let her find out for herself.
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Meg Metcalfe
{K:6114} 2/7/2007
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I'm worried for Sheila now, Arnald called away from a job fixing a stove you said...a widow you said!.....
I only hope Arnold keeps his hands on the job and not the widow!
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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Now listen here, Rebecca, just because 'Arnold' has already given Sheila a shot of love and her desire for him is stronger than ever doesn't mean she shouldn't be saved from the truth. Oh mercy... a trait I admire in people. Sure, finding out would be a blow, but after spending a fair bit of time out of mind, I'm certain she'd wake up to a new morning and be her freewheelin' self once more. Alternatively, she might decide she's had enough of guys and go for some blonde on blonde action. 'Good as I been to you...' she'd bark, 'you still told me nothing but lies. Men are no better than infidels! A sign of modern times, I suppose. A world gone wrong. Love and theft... '
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Leonie Fitzpatrick
{K:40551} 2/7/2007
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Come to think of it... ~~GRIN~~ as we speak, so is Sheila, loaded, one way or the other...
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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So we're still on about this background check thing are we! Sheeesh, I thought we were done with that.
And so what if Arnold IS Bob....he's loaded!! One way or another....
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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You know what... I've just thought of something. Arnold bears an uncanny resemblance to Bob Dylan in the mid 1980s when he 'ate all the pies' as we say in the UK. So I am becoming fairly convinced that Arnold is in fact... BOB DYLAN! He knew Sheila liked his music, but also guessed that she didn't know what he looked like as she'd always taped his records from the guy who worked in the liquor store... he wanted to preserve his anonymity, hence Sheila's knowing very little about 'Arnold''s background. The reluctance to use the name 'Isis' just confirms my theory for sure!!
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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Coincidentally, Sheila delivered on the fifth day of May, and Arnold will never forget the way that she smiled (could have been the drugs), or the drizziling rain!!!
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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'Isis, oh Isis, you mystical child / What drives me to you is what drives me insane'
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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OMG Patrick!!!! One of those names is a go!!! It isn't Isis tho', Sheila is a big BOB fan but Arnold felt it a little odd, and tended to lean towards more popular names.
Wow, whoda thunk it?!!! That psychic link thing, you might be onto something there!!
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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OK, if it's a boy... Damien, Shane, Brett, Scott, Ricky, Osvaldo, Percival. If it's a wee lassie... Sheila Jnr, Kylie, Esmeralda, Mungo, Mabel, Isis, Petunia, Intestina.
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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Silly, silly me...read that as telepathic bondage.
Ooops! Is that even possible?
Any-hoo, yes I do believe you are right Patrick, now...if you can suggest some names for the new arrival, we shall test your powers (I do already know the front-runners).....
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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'fastest gun in town'...! LOL! Yeah, 18 seconds fast!
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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You know what's happening here, don't you? The communication that Sheila and Arnold's rampant affair has generated between us has actually generated a psychic linkage... isn't that wonderful?! So not only has the world been given the finest tale of two lovebirds since Ingrid and Humph in 'Casablanca', it also has a genuine case of telepathic bonding to investigate!!
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Leonie Fitzpatrick
{K:40551} 2/7/2007
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Who is that masked man???... OH! It's ok... It's only the fastest gun in town... No protection, and certainly not blanks... ~~GRIN~~... ARNOLD...
... and Sheila... It's OK... I understand that face so well... (Bit sad really, thought you'd make it through a natural birth... BUT, what the hey... Modern medicine to the rescue...)
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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I feel Patrick that I may have just had my own psychic moment....WOW!!! Trippy ;^O
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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'DON'T YOU HURT MY DOG!' How strange... I watched 'Hannibal' on TV last night... mmm, how pleasant it was!
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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Can that be thaid with a lithp?
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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Ha Patrick! Sheila is worried too....as soon as Arnold, in his quest for her to regain her figure, starts muttering the words "it rubs the lotion on it's skin or it gets the hose again" she is outta there!!!
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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Hmm... that mask Arnold's wearing isn't so far away from a large paper bag with eyeholes cut out of it... does he have a bizarre speech impediment as well? I now have John Hurt and Arnold mixing together in my mind in a bizarre cinematic / photographic hybrid... it is most disturbing.
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rebecca claassen
{K:12904} 2/7/2007
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HUSH Patrick, you cannot mention the word 'elephant' in front of Sheila!!!! Arnold neglected to let Sheila in on the little know fact that in college, he was nicknamed 'elephant man' by his mates!!!!
They do say it only needs to happen once you know, and Sheila will vouch for the truth in that staement!!!
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Patrick Crowther
{K:13393} 2/7/2007
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I am pi**ing myself laughing! Rebecca, you are a genius! Poor Sheila, she looks like she's trying to pass an elephant through the eye of a needle! Still, I'm sure all that effort will be well worth it! She was given drugs you say? So she's not only in agony, but wacked out as well! Oh the sweet suffering of a woman in labour..
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